savings account

Last night I was driving home from being out with my co-workers and my cell phone went off in the car and "Dad's Cell" lit up on the screen. I just watched it ring in the darkness as I drove down the freeway, waiting for yet another empty voicemail, which never says what it should. This is only the second or third call in over a year and a half.

I remember going to lay in bed shortly after I got home and playing the message on speakerphone for Erik. Hot tears rolled down my cheeks listening to my dad's emotionless voice talking through pretty emotion filled subjects if you know what I mean....
My dad always leaves the same message: condescending, belittling, degrading, and always accusatory.

So anyway, today was payday, and it was time. After work, I went straight to Wells Fargo and opened a savings account to start saving for our wedding. I haven't had a savings account since I was about 15 years old...so yeah, whatever, it felt like a big deal. As broke as Erik and I have been (as WE ALL have been LOL) I put $180 in there and felt really proud of myself as I drove home. I wanted so badly just to tell someone, but no one would understand why something so small would mean so much to me.
My pride is just in the fact that I don't need any help. I'm used to not getting it, I was raised without it. I was kicked out of my house at 17 years old, and I've made it on my own ever since. I paid my own bills, got my own place, and paid my own way through college, never receiving so much as a nickel from my parents.
And even though I have sometimes felt frustrated and hopeless already in this wedding process, I know I can do this to. Where there's a will, there's a way.
I can plan this wedding, I will make it work...just like I've always had to make it work...without them.